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The Mutant Mummy Returns

The Mutant Mummy Returns
or
Welcome to Some Decade
or
‘Now We Know the Third One Is Always the Worst’ Is an Actual Line Spoken In this Film

a kindly review of X-Men: Apocalypse
by David Clemmer

In ancient Egypt, there was a vastly powerful man. At the height of his glory, in the middle of Some Magical Shit or Something™, he was betrayed and contained for centuries until awoken in the more-or-less modern age. Two hours of bad screenwriting and CGI later were wished back by thousands, and that wish was denied by a cold and empty cosmos.

my manOnly, you know, blue.

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